Note: Before reading the following arguments, please understand that they are not what I believe. On Wednesdays, I deliberately argue for wrong ideas, challenging my listeners to call and defend the obvious right answer, which is usually far harder than one would expect. This is a summary of what Wacky Andrew will be arguing, not a representation of what real Andrew believes.
Apologizing often makes the other person feel superior and inflates their ego.
Apologizing makes you look bad and loses face.
Even if you were wrong this time, there must have been tons of other times when they were wrong and you were right but you didn’t get the credit you deserved.
If you don’t get credit most of the time for the good you do, why should you get blame for the bad you do occasionally.
People respect strength, and they need to perceive you as strong to follow your lead.
When you apologize, people take advantage of you.
People don’t forgive you anyhow. They say ridiculous things like, “Oh, it’s no big deal,” or, “That’s okay.”
We’re supposed to imitate Jesus, and He never apologized, right?
If people get used to the idea that you’re wrong some of the time, they’ll come to expect you to be wrong more often, and they’ll expect you to apologize more, too.
Most apologies are strategic anyhow, and not genuine. I’m sorry, but… or they contain some sort of a justification or miss the point.
Apologizing doesn’t change the situation or undo the bad thing that was done, so what’s the point?
When people know they can apologize for doing wrong, they are actually more willing to do it because they think they can just apologize if they get caught. Forgiveness is easier to get than permission, but if you take away forgiveness, you force people to seek permission.
It just imposes upon someone else the burden of feeling the need to forgive, which they may not want to do.
In fact, since forgiving is an even greater thing if the person hasn’t asked for it, apologizing diminishes the moral worth of the best forgiveness.
Love means never having to say you’re sorry.
Links
Bible References: Lev 5:1-13, Lev 16:20-22, Lev 26:38-42, Num 5:5-8, Num 13:25-14:45, 1 Sam 25:1-38, 2 Chron 6:12-42, 2 Chron 7:11-15 , Ezra 10:1-12, Psalm 32:5, Prov 28:13-14, Dan 9:1-19, Matt 3:1-12, Matt 6:6-15, Matt 18:21-35, Mark 1:1-5, Mark 11:24-26, Luke 11:1-4, Luke 17:1-10, Acts 19:11-20, 2 Cor 2:1-11, Eph 4:25-32, Col 3:12-13, James 5:16, 1 John 1:8-10
Serena and sexism (NYT)
Public tirades and our current civility (ABC News)
Serena finally apologizes (ABC News)
Rep. Joe Wilson’s outburst (ABC News)
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